Speaker Spotlight: Heather Parbst, Empowering Leaders to Build Change

Heather Parbst has built a career around leaning into opportunity and following her passions, no matter where the path may lead. From successfully scaling and selling an IT services firm to advising and coaching leaders at Fortune 500 companies, Heather has successfully navigated multiple career transitions and industry jumps, defying any conventions that exist about traditional career pathways.

Heather’s journey has included entrepreneurship, Corporate America and everything in between, and each career decision has been guided by her belief that “leadership is about owning your responsibility and ability to empower those around you in a way that generates value, sustainability, and positive impact for all.”

We are delighted to have Heather join our virtual stage for our upcoming leadership intensive, “Let’s Change the Leadership Game.” Below, we stole a few minutes with Heather to get her thoughts on everything from non-linear career paths to shifting definitions of leadership….

To begin, can you tell our readers about your background and how it has led you down both corporate and entrepreneurship pathways?

After changing my major several times, I landed on psychology and went to work after college in the mental health and social services field where I worked with people struggling with substance abuse, families in the welfare system and people struggling with significant mental illness and poverty. After a while, I shifted to working with victims of child abuse as a forensic interviewer. While that job was incredibly challenging and I saw a lot of horrible things, I found it to be one of the most—if not the most—rewarding job of my career. It was an honor to be there for those children during that time in their lives.

But over time I became very disillusioned by the lack of leadership and collaboration between different agencies which sometimes had tragic consequences for the children. Shortly after leaving I decided to open my own therapy practice but quickly learned that I had not built the connections I needed to start a company and I had burned out. This led to me to shift into the business world for what I thought would be a brief break from my “real” career as a part time office manager of a computer repair company. I quickly realized I liked the excitement of learning about business and being able to build something from the ground up without all the bureaucracy I had experienced at previous jobs. So, I made that a full-time job, became partner, changed the business model, grew it over eight years, then sold it.

After that, I took off a short period of time to be with my infant daughter and ponder what I wanted next. I really missed the more personal connections and ability to empower people I had with counseling, but I loved business too! So, I decided to combine those and do coaching and consulting for entrepreneurs. That worked for me for a time, but I missed working with a team and felt that my learning was stagnating a little, so when I got offered a position with another consulting firm, I took it. My work with this firm has afforded me some phenomenal experiences and allowed me to support leaders in everything from small tech startups to Fortune 500 companies. I’ve loved helping leaders become more balanced, better leaders and organizations become healthier and more sustainable. It’s been a very interesting journey.

Increasingly, we are seeing women embrace the non-linear career pathway, making turns and adjustments when they want. How has your own journey echoed that and how have you granted yourself permission to do so?

Before I graduated college, I worked in typical jobs such as dishwasher, waitstaff, but I also had unusual jobs (sawmill, putting up fence, making furniture). Then after college, I worked my way through licensure as a psychotherapist and went from there to CEO of a tech company and now I do business consulting and executive coaching.

From early on, I haven’t known what I want to be when I grow up and part of that is because I’ve put so much pressure on myself for finding the ONE thing that would make me happy. Now, looking back, I can see how these roles tied together and give me a unique perspective that brings a lot of value to whatever field I am working in, but in the moment—when I was in the midst of the struggle, neither permission nor grace were something I granted myself easily.

Each career shift was incredibly stressful and anxiety provoking. In addition to questioning my decision, I questioned whether I’d be taken seriously. It was very hard but much of my stress was self-induced and unnecessary. Now I have a very different perspective. I’m hopeful that my experience can help other people be a little kinder with themselves and see the value of embracing rather than resisting the changing currents of their careers.

You have a specific focus on women’s leadership and women’s entrepreneurship in your work. What are some of the top challenges that still exist for women when it comes to leadership?

It’s important to acknowledge that while we’ve come far in creating more equity and opportunity for women, some of the blatant challenges like unequal pay, sexual harassment, and flat out discrimination still exist and women leaders face these regularly. I believe that many of the challenges we face now are more subtle and implicit. It could be a comment from a male colleague that reinforces a false limiting self-belief, for example. Or it could be the impossible standards we set for ourselves that others go along with because, why not? I think we are still expecting ourselves to be able to perform at the highest level in all areas of our lives all the time—simultaneously! We put so much pressure on ourselves and allow others to do the same.

I think women, as a group, are underconfident and still have not realized the power we hold in this world. While women are able to verbalize a rational understanding and belief that we are capable leaders and have the ability to accomplish great things, I don’t believe that at an unconscious level we have fully shed the belief paradigm passed down by previous generations. We don’t always believe it in our bones. Our biggest obstacle is that we still haven’t fully woken up to our own power. We haven’t realized yet that we can rewrite the rules of the game. It’s groups like the Women in Leadership Nexus that bring us closer to that tipping point.

How do you define leadership, against the changes we are seeing in the landscape?

Leadership now requires more versatility, adaptability and more ability to pivot than ever. Leaders can no longer just focus on profits, use brute force to push agendas through or neglect the social impact of their organizations. With the rapidity of change, leaders must also be able to discern when the correct decision is to slow down, do something different, or not go with the flow. That requires a confidence in decision making and a high level of comfort with ambiguity and with failure. There is no longer room in leadership for the overachieving perfectionist. Leaders must be able to guide organizations forward around a shared purpose as opposed to force, and they must be able to motivate and engage a diverse workforce. This requires considerable skill at collaboration and a high level of emotional intelligence.  

Leadership is also no longer about advancing your career or agenda while focusing solely on benefiting the top stakeholders or a board, or whoever the small group is at the top. Instead leadership is about owning your responsibility and ability to empower those around you in a way that generates value, sustainability, and positive impact for all. It’s a new world where there is a tremendous call for leaders of integrity and action who are not afraid to have tough conversations, who are not fearful of considering others views, and who will bring people together to collaborate and innovate in ways that creates positive and lasting change.

What is one piece of advice/quote you live by?

I like Brene’ Brown’s quote, “You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you cannot choose both.”

BONUS: What is next for you?

I’ve developed a comprehensive system that navigates owners through transitioning their company to new leadership, so I’ll be spending time building business around that service. I believe business can be a powerful force for good so you’ll see me helping more leaders committed to creating positive change navigate challenges and grow their businesses.

And I’m also very excited to share that I’ve partnered as a cofounder in The Grateful Wanderlust Project which leads people on personal growth focused outdoor adventures. You can think of it as unleashing that inquisitive, adventurous 8-year old explorer in all of us while also building some serious life skills. You’ll see us leading some women-only hiking and other events in spring that are going to be part personal growth retreat, part adventure, all aimed at helping women uncover and connect to their power.  I couldn’t be more excited!

And after that…we will just have to see!

To connect with Heather, click here.

Nexus members, to register for “Let’s Change the Leadership Game,” where you will have the chance to hear Heather speak, click here.